After writing Friday's post about the harrowing experience that my husband and I managed to survive the night before, I was extremely emotional. But instead of marinating in negative feelings (as I'm often prone to do), I decided to throw on my hiking boots and visit Sweetwater Wetlands here in Tucson. (One of my all-time … Continue reading A Beautiful Moment in Time
Suicidal Ideations & Grief in the Aftermath
I have a long and sordid history with suicide attempts and suicidal ideations (an awful Borderline trait). In addition, I lost my younger, Nicky, to suicide… and the grief that followed that event has touched every aspect of my life. These posts are as much about overcoming as they are about defeat.
Creating a Borderline
I don't feel down today, but I don't feel jazzed either. I'm still stuck in the muck of shame that splattered all around me after Thursday's melee with my husband, and the subsequent suicidal ideations. (Wandering into the black banner landscape of the Borderline Borderlands is an emotionally exhausting venture.) I broke a promise -- … Continue reading Creating a Borderline
Not My Finest Hour
Yesterday afternoon and evening were black banner hours in my Borderline world. The Insurance Impetus I gathered the mail, and found four unpaid medical bills. Some were expected, like the $40 copay I owed the cardiologist because their payment system was down on the day of my appointment. Others were highly unexpected, like the $300 … Continue reading Not My Finest Hour
Borderlines and Their Banners
To be a Borderline is akin to being ruled by mercurial, weather-induced mood swings. Imagine a bright blue sky, full of warm and comforting sunshine. As you hike underneath that beautiful firmament, it feels like happiness will eternally reign over all of your days. And then? A cloud rolls in. Just one, singular, menacing cloud. … Continue reading Borderlines and Their Banners
Nature and Nicky
After writing this morning about my frustrations, I got off my duff and went on a hike. (The power of words, am I right?!) I only managed to get 1.56 miles under my boots; but I'll take it, considering that I haven't been out in a while and it was ninety degrees outside. (God, I … Continue reading Nature and Nicky
Baitless Biter 